Monday, April 6, 2015

Five Ways to Guarantee Failure

I heard a wonderful TED Talk this morning by a young Brazilian woman named Bel Pesce.  



In six minutes she managed to spell out five things we can do to sabotage success at almost anything we try -- and their opposites, which if done, will result in achieving our goals and dreams, and more importantly, enjoying life along the way...

They are:
1.  Believe in overnight success.
She may have gotten into MIT as the result of spending a few hours filling out an application, but it took 17 years of hard work to get to that point.  Get used to it.  Overnight success is a myth.  It takes hard work and perhaps years of growth and experience.   

2.  Believe someone else has the answers for you.
Your dreams and goals are your dreams and goals, no one else's. Ignore what they say your goal and dreams should be.  Look within.  That's where you'll find them -- and the path to them that is yours alone.  

3.  Believe that when growth is guaranteed, you should settle down and rest. 
Keep going, and you'll be astonished at what more you can accomplish.  Don't settle for less, or for enough. Work a little harder and see what happens.

4.  Believe the fault is someone else's.
 Each of us is totally responsible for our successes and failures.  We can't blame a bad market,  or a      lousy upbringing, disabilities, bad luck, or, indeed, circumstances "beyond our control."  We will surely fail if we do.  If we fail, it's our fault.  And if we succeed, it's our success, our doing, and no      one else's -- though others can certainly help and support and encourage us.

5.  Believe only the goals matter.  
Reaching a goal or attaining a dream is one moment in time.  The only way to achieve a dream or a goal is to enjoy the journey every moment along the way. What matters is today. So lean into it, or as Deborah Elfers and friends would say: Have a one-buttock day! It's not about winning the race. It's about having a hell of a good time and leaning forward up the windward leg, and back down to the finish.   A remarkable thing happens when you do lean into whatever you are doing.  Instead of you leaning and pushing, the activity itself starts to pull you in -- and then it becomes almost effortless. BTFI!  That last insight isn't mine, or Bel's.  It comes from Benjamin Zander -- Deborah Elfers' amazing teacher.      

Here's a link to her talk: http://www.ted.com/speakers/bel_pesce

Her website:  www.belpesce.com





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